2009 Ethiopia Calendar Fundraiser

A few of us in the London area have put together a 2009 calendar using pictures taken in Ethiopia by Canadian Humanitarian and an adoptive family. All of the money raised will go to support Canadian Humanitarian's projects in Ethiopia.

-Only $10-

The money raised by purchasing one calendar can pay for one child's school fees in Ethiopia for 2.5 months.

-The calendar is a 8.5 x 11 inch, 12 month wall calendar featuring beautiful photographs taken in Ethiopia and is marked with Canadian and Ethiopian Holidays.

-Every month has interesting facts about Ethiopian culture, history and people as well as information about Canadian Humanitarian's projects in Ethiopia.

-Great Christmas Gifts!

-To order please email: london@canadianhumanitarian.com or you can leave me your contact info in "comments"

-payments can be made by paypal online (we will email you an invoice) or money order via mail. If you do not live in the London Ontario area we will quote you our best shipping rate (within Canada the cost to ship one calendar is $2 - for more than one we can provide a quote upon request).

-When the fundraiser is finished I will let you know on the blog how much money we were able to raise. We are really excited to try to raise some money for a great cause. Canadian Humanitarian does a lot to help secure a future for vulnerable kids in Ethiopia.

Thanks for your time and support!

For more info on Canadian Humanitarian click here.

Three

Today’s post is brought to you by the three amigos -
We have reached three months of waiting for a referral, and are now just shy of 9 months since we started this whole process (2.5 months for our homestudy, 3 months waiting for ministry approval, and 3 months waiting for a referral so far).

When we first signed on with our agency we were told the wait for a referral would be 2-4 months, then we were told it had changed to 4-6 months…now I am hearing rumours of 6-8 months (but I admit I have not been able to let myself accept that yet). Then once we get a referral we have anywhere from 2-3 months to wait for a court date, and who knows how long for a Visa (our child will come home as a permanent resident and then we will apply for Canadian citizenship).

As a woman I think when you mentally let yourself believe you are going to be a mother your emotions take over and start telling you as you approach the 9 month mark that it is going to happen soon (I think it is fair to say that could be an innate response). I find that I have reached a critical point where every hour of the day I am now thinking about adoption. It is starting to feel really hard. I might think I was going crazy, but I know from the rest of this community that this is a common feeling. I think it is the uncertainty that drives you bonkers. But as stressed out as I am, I wouldn't change a thing! Sometimes I feel selfish about feeling blue because it is our children who are caught up in red tape who this wait affects the most. So, I will do my best to pass the time and continue to dream about my little one who is a world away.

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....hmm I think I need something new to help me pass the time… maybe I will start to work on the baby's room.

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PS. Thank goodness for all of you reading this who 'get' how it feels, the adoption community is such great source of support, I don't know what we would do without you!

Quotes that Inspire

I just wanted to share some of my favourite quotes,

Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we've been waiting for. We are the change that we seek. Barack Obama

Ultimately, man should not ask what the meaning of his life is, but rather he must recognize that it is he who is asked. Viktor Frankl

You must be the change you wish to see in the world. Mahatma Gandhi
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Unlearn

This is a really neat company that sells t-shirts and other stuff with different images to provoke thought. I thought these ones were really neat. The idea is to “unlearn what society has programmed you to learn. Start fresh with your own ideas, philosophy of life.”
You can check out their website here: http://www.unlearn.com/scripts/default.asp
and a list of store locations here: http://www.unlearn.com/shop_stores.htm
I think I will get one of the ones I posted above. So many t-shirts have company logo's on the front of them, but what good does that do (well I'm sure it helps to advertise and make millions for some big wig out there somewhere)? Hey, why not let our clothing do more than just brand us.

Adoption Clubhouse/Grannies Helping Grannies

Some of you may have come across this website before, but I thought I would share it for those who have not. It is called the "Adoption clubhouse" and it is a site for kids. It has book reviews, questions/answers for kids, fun stuff like colouring pages or a list of famous people who were adopted. It also had a list of annoying questions adopted kids might be asked and suggestions for how to deal with them etc...

My mom and I went tonight to the London library to see Paulette Pelletier-Kelly speak about her trip to Uganda, South Africa and Swaziland. Paulette was one of 12 grandmothers from seven provinces chosen through the Stephen Lewis Foundation to visit Africa and to see the work being done by them. It was really interesting listening to her stories, and I think it is such a great thing that Steven Lewis has done - to mobilize the grannies here for their "sisters" in Africa.

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"An estimated 13 million children have been orphaned by AIDS in sub-Saharan Africa, and it’s the grandmothers of the country who have stepped up to care for them. After burying their own children, these women take in their grandchildren and attempt to feed and clothe them while continuing to work. In their 50s, 60s and even 70s, they become parents again. And not only to their own family, but to their neighbour’s orphaned kids as well. Some grandmothers take care of up to 20 children. One in particular has been known to care for 28."

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If you know of a granny who is interested in joining a group in her area tell her to visit this website for more details: http://www.grandmotherscampaign.org/

"That's So Gay" Think B4U Speak

I LOVE these videos! When we have kids both Matthew and I believe it is really important that we model how to treat all people with the respect they deserve. It drives us nuts when we hear people crack jokes about minority groups - be that racial, ethnic, sexual etc..(where do some people get off thinking they have the right to judge others they usually know nothing, or very little, about?). Being a quiet person I often feel like I want to say something, but I am not sure what to say without creating a big scene. I know it will be easier to find the strength to speak up when there are a little set of ears listening in.

Anyways, check out these videos if you haven't already seen them - they ROCK!!

World Food Day

So we have almost made it through the 30 hrs - few. When we got home from work we agreed that it wasn't that bad while we were keeping busy. However, there was a quick deterioration with Matthew tonight. Shortly after getting home he became crazy and he would not stop talking about food (this was not helping me one bit). He talked about food non-stop all night! Saying things like:
"what if I have one trisket, do you think that is against the rules?"...hmmmm "ah, yep Matthew that is food".
or, "pizza, swiss chalet quarter chicken dinner with sauce, Indian naan bread, soda crackers, roast beef, cheese, tandori chicken X 100 other random things" then he would throw his head in his hands and fake cry.
then at 8pm he said something to the effect of "my life is over, there is nothing for me to do, I'm going to bed" and off he went.

I'm not going to lie, I feel pretty darn hungry as well. All joking aside (and the joking was to try to help us deal with the stress of feeling hungry), this really has helped to put into perspective again how much we take having quick access to food for granted. It has unmasked a learned behaviour - when we feel hungry an impulse kicks in that tells us there is something we can eat at arms reach. Then on the way to the fridge we have to remind ourselves that "no" not tonight. I can't imagine what it would be like growing up learning that food is not always available, not always healthy and safe to eat, and not always easy to access. Would your body still crave it or would it to some extent give up?

The other thing I noticed was how important drinking becomes when you are not eating. I couldn't stop thinking about drinking all day. But many people who don't have food, also don't have access to clean water.

Then to think of all the food that is wasted and thrown out in this country, the food fights kids have in school, the overeating - this is insane!!. This activity has reminded us to be more respectful of food. Our hearts go out to the people living in the midst of the food crisis in Ethiopia, what a crazy world it is that we live in!

Tilly Take Two

So here is part two of a little segment I think we should call "make your cat look like an ass". hehe. For part one look back a few posts and look for her dressed as a pirate. I clearly have too much free time on my hands! Please someone get those referrals moving so I can become a mom and then I will have more sense of purpose in my life (or at least I will have something more important to do than to dress up my cat).

Tilly wasn't a big fan of the devil outfit I've got to say- we had to throw some catnip down so that it would be a tolerable experience for her.

On another note we have now started our 30 hr famine. So far no problem because we are not used to eating late at night, but we will see how tomorrow goes.

Also, we went and got our Hep A/Yellow Fever/Typhoid/Meningitis shots today - ouch!! I thought the flu shot made you feel like you had been socked in the arm, this one is like a double punch. I know we are a long ways away from travelling but the travel Dr. in London said we could get them this early and they would last.

Oct 16th - 30 Hour Thanksgiving Famine

This Thursday Matthew and I are going to go without food for 30 hours to:

-Celebrate World Food Day Oct 16th (a worldwide event designed to increase awareness - around action to alleviate hunger).

-Celebrate Blog Action day Oct 15th (where everyone with a blog is encouraged to blog about poverty that day and do something to raise awareness)

-Celebrate Thanksgiving Day in a different way. It was great sharing time with family over the weekend but, after eating a BIG turkey dinner and having a family BBQ, we wondered if there may be another way to ``say thanks`` that also respectfully acknowledges the other people in the world who didn’t have a big meal to sit down to. Sometimes having less of something makes you appreciate it more then when you are overindulging in it.

Back when we were in University my hubby and I participated in a 24 hour famine. At the time we thought – ``24hrs can’t be that bad``…and we were surprised a LOT by how hungry we felt and how difficult it was. Going through the day feeling hungry made for a good opportunity to reflect on our eating habits, and to try to imagine what it must feel like being one of the millions of people in the world with poor access to food. At the time we talked about how it would be a good thing to do on a yearly basis, even if we didn’t fundraise, to raise our own self awareness. However, years passed and we never did it again. I feel a bit ashamed after overeating this weekend – and this is an attempt to put things back into perspective.

So from 9 pm Wed night until Friday morning we will not have anything to eat. I wonder how difficult we will find it this time? I will keep you posted...

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If anyone wants to join in and do this with us just let me know!

Please VOTE - Support Ethiopia Reads!

Ethiopia Reads founder Yohannes Gebregeorgis is one of the 10 finalists for CNN's Hero of the Year. You can vote for your choice of 'hero of the year' here: http://heroes.cnn.com/default.asp

The winner will receive $100,000 for their program!

Ethiopia Reads is a grassroots non profit/non government organization geared toward bringing literacy and literacy related resources to Ethiopia. Yohannes has started a lot of different projects including a mobile donkey library to get books to kids in poor rural areas- very cool!

Black Doll - White Doll

So here is my first doll purchase. As a perent to be I am already starting to feel very aware and concerned about how the outside world will influence my child. One of the first things I noticed in the store was that there were very few black dolls to choose from, and many of the ones that were on the shelf were tucked in at the back behind other white doll boxes.

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I also noticed that the girl dolls for the most part had pink outfits and long hair and the boy dolls had blue outfits and short hair. So there I was thinking – here is the message that society seems to want to send to my children – boys like blue, girls like pink and black is second best, but what message do I want them to get?

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I want my son or daughter to celebrate diversity and feel proud of who they are. If we have a boy I want him to know that it is good to be nurturing and caring and it is ok to play with a doll in pink. So I have a plan - and that is to get my litle boy a pink doll with long hair, and if we have a girl, to buy her some little blue trucks (to counter balance the stereotypes other people will try to send). But, since we don’t know the sex of our baby, and since I needed a little retail therapy to help with all of this waiting, I ended up going with a black doll with a white outfit. Am I over thinking the whole thing? Or, maybe as a parent you can never think too much about these types of things.
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When I got home I tried to research a little more and came accross this interesting article:

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What Dolls Can Tell Us About Race in America

In the article 21 black children in the states were asked to choose between a white and a black doll, and 15 of them choose the white doll saying it was “pretty” and “nicer” than the black doll.
Some people have responded by saying this is a reflection of the subtle messages we are sending our children about race. In another article I read one mother noted "I'm not happy about it, but I'm not shocked. My daughter goes to a predominantly white school and a lot of her friends are white, and that's what she sees around her in the media and so on. And, when we go shopping, for example, there are no positive images of people like her." Her sentiments were echoed by husband Clayton: "If there were more positive black images and more black teachers in schools, then life might change for our little kids, but what they see is whites on TV doing well and black people doing bad."

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As white parents adopting a black child I think it is really important that we think about what the outside world is telling our child. We, and our other family members, will not be able to act as the positive black role models our child needs and because of that we need to put extra effort into making sure we find ways to compensate. Especially since the media and outside world doesn't always seem to do a great job at this.

Ahoy Me Maties!

Not much new with us except that I picked Miss. Tilly up a Halloween costume (this may also indicate that I have too much time on my hands), and we went to see the African Children's Choir again - this time in London, and they were great!! We don't have a little one to dress up this year and I think poor Tilly is living with the consequences (haha).
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These kids are so amazing! If you want to see if they are coming to your area click here!